Pop culture & power

Billy Corgan Said the Quiet Part Out Loud About Dating Younger Women

October 27, 2026

This episode is for you if you’ve ever side-eyed a celebrity age gap and then wondered if you were being judgy. Or if you think “they’re both adults” is the end of the conversation (spoiler: Becky and Taina don’t totally agree on that either).

When Billy Corgan went on the New York Times Popcast, the Smashing Pumpkins frontman explained that he’s with his much younger wife because women his own age come with too much “baggage.” He also defended his friendship with Marilyn Manson. Becky and Taina dig into age gap relationships, grooming, and power dynamics, and how a culture obsessed with youth teaches men to want younger and younger women.

And for once, they don’t fully agree. Becky argues that huge age gaps between powerful older men and very young women reflect a system that values women for their youth, even when both people are adults. Taina pushes back: adults get to choose their relationships, and essentializing younger people can slide into ageism. Along the way, they get into Hannah Waddingham’s viral Jennifer Hudson moment, why the richest people take the fewest risks, the stats on who gets targeted, and why dating someone your own age can feel like such a relief.

In This Episode, We Get Into:

• Billy Corgan’s claim that women his age have “baggage,” and what that really says about him
• Why a 45-year-old famous man dating a 19-year-old raises grooming red flags
• Corgan’s defense of Marilyn Manson, and “believe women, unless it’s your friend”
• The idea that Gen Z women got “all the benefits of feminism” (spoiler: we’re not post-patriarchy)
• Why the wealthiest people risk the least: Metallica, Ed Sheeran, and golden handcuffs
• Youth obsession, the male gaze, and the line from “barely legal” culture to the Epstein files
• Hannah Waddingham, gray hair, wrinkles, and the safety of being with someone who wants a peer
• Whether critiquing age gaps is ageist, and “equals” vs. “peers”
• Bill Belichick and the “feminist” permission structure
• Ageism, sexism, and racism as intersecting systems (and why therapy is the real recommendation)

Timestamps

• 00:00 – Intro
• 00:33 – Becky’s new obsession: Rec League
• 03:39 – Billy Corgan and the myth of the “not political” rock star
• 05:05 – Capitalism, wealth, and why the richest risk the least
• 09:00 – Billy Corgan (59) and his wife (33): the age gap debate begins
• 10:39 – Youth obsession, the male gaze, and the Epstein files
• 12:59 – They met when she was 19 and he was 45: is that grooming?
• 15:03 – Corgan defends Marilyn Manson
• 17:34 – The “no baggage” clip
• 19:38 – Taina’s take: adults get to choose (but it sounds like work)
• 22:19 – “Gen X women weren’t feminist enough”?!
• 25:38 – Becky reflects on her own 7-year age gap at 17
• 26:35 – Hannah Waddingham, Jennifer Hudson, and dating your own age
• 29:03 – A green flag: partners who are attracted to their own age
• 30:31 – Is critiquing age gaps ageist? Equals vs. peers
• 35:11 – Where do we draw the line in the Epstein era?
• 37:06 – The stats on age, sexual violence, and street harassment
• 39:43 – Bill Belichick and the “feminist” permission structure
• 41:11 – Our own relationships, ego, and the need for validation
• 44:40 – Ageism, sexism, and who actually holds power
• 48:30 – “Yes, and”: age gap relationships can exist AND reflect a broken system
• 49:53 – Boys and sexual abuse
• 52:05 – Recommendations: go to therapy (and Rec League)

Resources Mentioned

• Billy Corgan on the New York Times Popcast
• Hannah Waddingham on The Jennifer Hudson Show
• Becky’s essay: “Old men dating young women (and no, she’s not equally gross nor responsible)”
• Rec League (recommendation app)
• Taskmaster (YouTube)
• Audre Lorde, bell hooks, and Angela Davis
• RAINN National Sexual Assault Hotline: 800-656-4673